Venus-Neptune in Synastry
Venus is the planet of beauty, pleasure, and harmony, and rules our one-on-one relationships. Neptune is the planet of fantasy, dreams, idealism and delusion.
When Venus meets Neptune in synastry, a soul connection is indicated. You probably met each other when you were looking for the relationship of your dreams. We all have an idea of our perfect match, our knight in shining armor with whom we will share a fairy-tale love story. When someone’s Neptune makes an aspect to your Venus, you feel as though your dreams have come true.
With this aspect comes the tendency to view each other in the best light possible. The little, or big, characteristics that would normally bother you about someone are glossed over in favor of their better qualities. The Venus person tends to project her fantasies onto the Neptune person, assigning him the qualities of her ideal match. The Neptune person may or may not actually possess these qualities, but tends to play along to please the Venus person.
The couple gets caught up in the other-worldliness and fantasy the relationship offers. This can cause major problems later on, as Neptune is bound to err in some way or another, which leads to disappointment on the part of the Venus person. Venus’ refusal to see Neptune for who he really is lends itself to self-defeating behavior; in reality, no one is perfect, so Neptune will eventually fall off the pedestal Venus holds him so highly upon.
Another danger of this aspect is outright deception. Yes, Neptune feels pressure to fulfill the fantasies of the Venus person. Like Venus, Neptune aims to please. This desire to keep Venus’ fantasy alive could lead Neptune to lie and deceive the Venus person. While on some level, Venus may feel something is not quite right, she subconsciously chooses to overlook these inconsistencies, thereby ignoring the truth to keep the dream alive. Usually, Venus eventually realizes Neptune is human, and he isn’t perfect, which can lead to disappointment and a broken heart.
Another manifestation of this aspect involves a victim-savior scenario. Venus may be drawn to Neptune because he needs “help”. Perhaps he is an alcoholic. Perhaps he is a drug addict. Perhaps he has unresolved issues from the past which he is dealing with. Neptune draws out Venus’ compassion and sensitivity, stimulating her desire to “save” him. This can be dangerous, as the relationship can become unhealthily co-dependent.
The preceding description is especially applicable to hard synastry aspects (conjunction, square, opposition) between Venus and Neptune. The harmonious aspects (sextile and trine) are less intense, and foster the positive characteristics of Venus-Neptune aspects such as compassion, forgiveness, and a feeling of unity.